20 Things I Learned From Tech Support

  • As long as the world turns, users will still have problems

  • Substance abusers and computer operators are the only folks called users. This isn't by chance

  • When in doubt. Reboot

  • Sooner or later you will meet a person who types out the words "back slash" or forgets to plug in the power cord. If you haven't yet, just wait, you will

  • Fear the phone. No one just calls tech support to wish you good morning

  • No user will tell you the whole truth at the beginning of a call

  • "I didn't do anything" or "It just happened" Are the users mantra

  • As a support tech, it is your job to break down resistance and get the truth

  • This is so you can rub the lie in their face, fixing the issue is just a perk

  • Some people will never learn

  • This means you will always have a job

  • Maintain a calm voice, even if you're screaming on the inside

  • The hold button is your friend

  • Whatever you do, don't panic

  • The answer to all users questions should be "Trust me, I know what I'm doing" even if this is a bald-faced lie

  • Users can smell fear. Once you've lost control, all is lost

  • A user who is not listening to you anymore, but rather is trying "their own thing" is not worth your time. Simulate a telephone disconnect and hang up. Trust me, you're better off.

  • Sometimes fixing a computer is easier than figuring out why it was broken

  • Users always want a reason things are fixed. If you're not sure just lie. They won't know anyway. "A stray electron passed through the processor and caused..."

  • If possible ask to speak to the youngest person present
  • 201 comments:

    1 – 200 of 201   Newer›   Newest»
    Anonymous said...

    I fear the phone at work...

    A great lie:
    "The flux capacitor was damaged"
    I actually used that one in response to a user´s "I think it needs more fictional memory"

    Anonymous said...

    It would be more accurately titled 20 reasons why nobody likes Tech Support.

    Number 1 should have been When in doubt try and bs your way through.

    Peter Brown said...

    Anonymous-

    I've spent a lot of time, trying to persuade users that I *do* know what I'm talking about... Sometimes they take the fake answers so much more readily!

    Anonymous said...

    True Story: I told a customer the "mouse server" is down.
    I had to put the phone on mute while I laughed when they said "ohh okay".

    Anonymous said...

    as long as people continue to use Windows, Tech support will be around.

    Anonymous said...

    The other anonymous has never worked in tech support. I love the entire list.

    Anonymous said...

    Im not in Technical Support, Im a Moron Translator, I translate Customer non-sense to logical conversation.

    Daniel said...

    This was so spot on! I've worked with support in different environments for the last 6 years and wow - these 20 statements really sums the whole business up.

    Anonymous said...

    I used to love being told 'Oh, what do you know, you are only aISP tech support monkey!!'

    I also enjoy the 'I'm a system administrator and I know blah blah blahdy blah' - then why are you calling us?

    Anonymous said...

    I'd also add -- When in doubt, reformat. I've seen people waste WEEKS trying to troubleshoot something that could have been fixed by a reformat and reinstall. And I don't want to hear from anyone who says this isn't really addressing the issue, Yes, it is -- Time is really expensive nowadays.

    Anonymous said...

    haha brilliant, you just made my day!

    Anonymous said...

    I've been on both sides, but I think the tech support is just insane. I mean there's a lot of slacking off going on. When I was on tech support I really did try to help people and I had the knowledge to actually back it up. Years later I've talked to tech support staff that were just horrible, but I never blew up at them..I'm always polite, but I still stay firm on what I'm asking for.

    The main thing when dealing with tech support is that if you know what you're doing but still have to deal with tech support, then do so - but do it politely and firmly and ensure that you use the right terminology to show that you know what's what..again don't try to impress them, just politely correct them if they try to lead you elsewhere. Some times you'll get someone who's not exactly great at their job, and in these cases you just have to guide them along to what you want.

    Anonymous said...

    "Trust me, I know what I'm doing"

    My answer is usually "why?"
    Unfortunately, tech support people all fall into two categories: those people who actually have some idea of what they're talking about and assume all users are morons, and those who have no idea what they're doing and assume all users are morons.
    It is especially frustrating trying to get help when you know more about the product than they do

    Just remember that sometimes people who are not complete morons have problems. They are the frustrated exception to the rules

    Anonymous said...

    The most embarrassing thing is when tech support has to support someone who actually does know what they're talking about. remember that helpdesk/tech support is one of the first steps in an IT career - if you deal with other more experienced IT workers in this manner, they'll laugh at you and become very annoyed very quickly - not to mention making a serious complaint about your ability to you manager.

    Unfortunately in corporate situations, everyone has to call the helpdesk/service desk to get most things done due to desktop lockdown policies.

    Also, technical people buy technical equipment and that technical equipment isn't flawless, so you'll likely meet these more experienced and more knowledgeable people in everyday consumer helpdesks too.

    Try to BS your way through with me, and you'll find your manager wanting to have a little chat with you.

    Anonymous said...

    One of the new guys brought us a good one, he tells people "it must be an I-D-10-T error" Nobody ever bothers to write it down, it just sounds official. ID10T.

    Anonymous said...

    about 99% of users complaints can be solved by using the three 'r's of tech support

    Restart
    Reboot
    Re-install.

    Juan said...

    At work we use the "It was a problem with the Lithium Crystals" line. But only when they are really really annoying.

    You always get the user that asks for help, but never listens to the solution!

    Last but not least, we SAY the following about some of our users
    i d 1 0 t but we never write it down!

    Anonymous said...

    So true.... specially this one

    "I didn't do anything" or "It just happened" Are the users mantra

    I once got someone bringing in a laptop with a broken screen claiming the above.

    Wayne Hoggett said...

    Great list. I think I will put it on my wall next to the phone.

    Anonymous said...

    There is another tip which saved me so many times it is not funny...

    "When a user keeps speaking over the top of you just sit there silently. Once they have talked themselves in circles and realise that the inane drivel they are sprouting makes no sense at all, or when they start wondering whether you are still there wait another 5 seconds, then pick up where they cut you off."

    I have to admit the guilty pleasures of a few tricks to act as safety valves in this work though:

    1 - Whenever someone started a call with threatening to switch back to the opposition, I would transfer them to the other company's sale's group.
    2 - Whenever someone started a call by raging about having waited 30 minutes to get through to me (when there were 60 people waiting behind them) I would tell them they'd be waiting another 30 minutes when they called back and cut the call. Sounds brutal, but by doing that I am saving every other caller another 5 minutes of wait time because this joker thinks I should apologise for working my arse off.

    Mind you, that was working on a phone fault line, so there are some difference to other support lines.

    Anonymous said...

    I was also in customer/ technical support...

    If some one says they cant see the internet connection (We were in ISP), the first question was "Please tell me Mr.ABC , can u see the lights on the modem?"

    "Modem?, what is that?"

    "It is that small box near to your computer, either gray, or purple, or...."


    Man..! it was Tuf..!

    Anonymous said...

    A lot of the items you listed are true.But a lot of tech people are not well trained .I time I called tech support i knew more than he did. I was having trouble setting up my wirelesss laptop. I had been
    using my laptop for over a year .The tech told me I coun't connect because I had no wireless card.and this was after I let hin take control of my cumputer from his location. I told him to get more training and give me to someone else who knew what they were doing, Oh by the way the tech
    support was DSL-Verizon. I dread calling them and always try to fix any problems myself.Only as a last resort do I call them.

    Guy said...

    heheh good post- I've found here in Spain that people in computer shops ALWAYS blame viruses- 'It had a virus so we wiped off all your data and installed Windows 98 with no drivers- that'll be €350 please'. luckily i don't have to deal with them cos i'm in tech support myself... i've heard some horror stories though.

    Unknown said...

    Thats actually not a very good list of 20 things you would have learned.

    From my experience working with tech support, I would keep about 8 of those.

    Anonymous said...

    One the first jobs I had was working on a helpdesk, I got a call one day and preceeded to ask the caller what she had on her desktop, big mistake, she proceeded to tell me that she had a stapler some postit notes, her monitor some pen etc. i had to put her on hold do i did not start laughing right then and there. I dont think i will ever forget that call ....

    Unknown said...

    I work for a digicam company tech support.
    Funniest thing is I had a customer call up, say she brought her camera to Wal Mart and they told her the flux capacitor was damaged.

    I had to put her on hold cause I burst out laughing.

    Anonymous said...

    Just tell them it was a id10t error

    Anonymous said...

    When you don't know the "why" the problem occurred, lie or just tell them, "I don't know why, but I am sure glad it's working. If you have this issue again, please feel free to call back." The issue is resolved, if they press, thell them they are on a need to know basis, if they had to call you to fix the issue, they don't need to know anything other than it's fixed.

    Anonymous said...

    its "bold faced lie"

    Anonymous said...

    One of my Mantras that I picked up in my travels (having been on both sides of the conversation) is that "The combined IQ of a tech support conversation remains constant."

    You either are a brilliant helpdesk jockey trying to help a user who has no clue where there "any" key is... Or you are a smart techie who is being fed scripted answers by a helpdesk line. You never run into a smart person on the other side of the conversation. :)

    MC said...

    My favourite bs answer is "You must have put your keyboard in delete mode". Gets them every time! :-)

    Anonymous said...

    I started working as a support tech thinking I could over look all the complaints about users that all the techs before me have shared. For the most part, this really is not possible.

    There are people who are interested in advancing themselves and learn quickly, and there are people who I would trust with a grilled cheese sandwich. My favorite are the people who pride themselves on being years behind in technology.

    To people that hate tech support, all I can say is, give us a call in a good mood one day, tell us a joke or how you appreciate us, and watch us be more cooperative. And if you don't know what you're doing with a computer, just say that up front. Using your ignorance as a justification for mistreating us is what makes us bitter.

    Unknown said...

    Having worked in both software and hardware tech support for 3 years I chuckled as I read this. I agree wholeheartedly.

    Anonymous said...

    Acctually if it was titled "20 reasons why nobody likes Tech Support." All twenty would start with the "tech support person is from India and..."

    Anonymous said...

    I wouldn't go with the "ask for the youngest person" thing, unless you're dealing with the unwashed masses, i.e. external customers, joe public. If you're dealing with internal corporate customers they can get pretty pissed if you try to ask for someone else to come to the phone.

    Basshound said...

    Users don't care why it's broken, they don't want to know what you are doing to fix it and they sure as hell don't want to hear that they were the cause, they just want it fixed so they can go back to playing solitare or shooting ducks in a flash game.

    Anonymous said...

    I would advise not making up an answer like, a stray electron... simply because users who think that a computer isn't a complex calculator will begin to think its a covetous box of secrets where any mystical thing can happen. Those are the users I always had the most problems helping.

    Anonymous said...

    It's exactly what I faced during support on f-source.com. It is only email and chat support. I patiently "maintain a calm voice", but the amount of users who "never learn" is constanly increased.

    I really love the users who send two messages: some question and second "Never mind, I figured it out." Endangered species :)

    Anonymous said...

    "..but it was working fine yesterday"

    Anonymous said...

    "The flux capacitor was damaged"
    i would said something else instead like "sir, you have jinks your system, go get a priest and have a exercist perform on it and then call back after 7 days. a leaking capacitor is the blood of the computer bein control by the devil. go get a priest"

    Pro Graphics LLC said...

    UM, You guys seem to be american tech support guys. Do you know the little dance I do everytime I call TS so that I may get someone from the USA??? Cause those people from India are useless 90 percent of the time.

    Anonymous said...

    Just think how bad it will get if more people adopt Linux.

    Wait type what...

    Peter Brown said...

    Sweet responses!

    For the record, I wrote this after speaking to a model user. It was so unreal I just had to purge all my anti-user feelings someplace...

    Sadly I can count these types on call s on one hand.

    Anonymous said...

    I have worked tech support for 15 years. This is the most useless post I have ever seen. This sounds like someone who JUST STARTED working in a call center and actually takes pride in their job. What a loser.

    Unknown said...

    I had someone say that their battery is dying and i told them to plug it into the wall and they said why and i was like cause your losing power and you need to plug it in....he responded yelling BUT ITS WIRELESS!!! and i laughed so freaking hard after that

    Peter Brown said...

    "I have worked tech support for 15 years. This is the most useless post I have ever seen. This sounds like someone who JUST STARTED working in a call center and actually takes pride in their job. What a loser"

    Thanks for stopping by and wasting my time too. I have been doing this for a l-o-n-g time. In fact it has been years since I worked at the tech support level. This is just fun anti-user sport.

    Anonymous said...

    ID10T errors... the close cousin of the PICNIC (Problem In Chair Not In Computer)

    Anonymous said...

    I have always liked the "PIBKAC error" Problem In Between Keyboard And Chair

    Anonymous said...

    I always like the error message

    ID10T Error

    An I/O error has occurred between the keyboard and the chair. Please turn off computer and never start it again.

    Truthspew said...

    Another goodie is user jealousy. During my first IT job one woman wanted a Mac LC475 so badly, she didn't like the fact that a co-worker got one and she didn't.

    Constant thorn. So one day I swapped the covers between my 475 and her LC3. She never knew it was the same machine, was pleased at how fast it was, etc.

    A little subterfuge goes a long way.

    Peter Brown said...

    Truthspew-

    That's great stuff! It's so true, if Bobby Sally and Joe don't all have the same there is going to be trouble. Even if it's all old...as long as no one has something better!

    Anonymous said...

    I'd like to know why Tech Support people usually can't tell you what's wrong. Just reboot the computer, is not an answer. I can do that myself. It isn't the reason I called you.

    You just don't know, do you?

    Anonymous said...

    You've either RTFM or you haven't and beyond that, the rest is just common sense.

    Anonymous said...

    PDA tech support ---

    Your screen's not working? Go ahead and pull out the stylus. Do you see any fluid on it? It also doubles as a liquid crystal fluid dipstick. Yeah, you're low on liquid crystal. Go ahead and go to one of the stores and request some crystal. They'll know what you're talking about...

    Anonymous said...

    To the anonymous product of our modern educational system who thinks the phrase should be "bold faced lie": No, the correct phrase is "bald-faced lie," as in open and unobscured, like a face without beard or mustache.

    It's bad enough how low the level of literacy has fallen in recent times, but to have poorly-read adolescents try to impose their ignorance on others is more than I can tolerate.

    Anonymous said...

    Sounds like something written by Simon Travaglia (the BOFH) - it's certainly the logo he uses.

    Anonymous said...

    Pretty funny...very true for the most part

    I am a senior level systems engineer now but have been in the "tech support" role before. I will say though that the majority of the time I speak to first level tech support about a piece of a equipment or software app we've purchased they are far more moronic than any user I used to deal with when I was in a "help desk" role.

    If you try to BS me you will be getting a visit from your manager.

    There are plenty of good ones out there however.

    Anonymous said...

    Thats mostly true. Although I did have one guy call just to ask me the date and time of day it was. Whats more interesting is that he had to wait in a 20 min queue. Weird?

    -Danny

    Anonymous said...

    My favorite is "There is a loose nut behind the keyboard, please power off and tighten it."

    Great post! All of these are so true!

    Anonymous said...

    I just love when you tell a user to reboot and then they get indigent and say they could have done that themselves. Then why didn't they do that first instead of calling the help desk.

    We get so tired of telling users to reboot first that we talked about putting in a phone message when you called the help desk asking them if they had rebooted before calling.

    Anonymous said...

    PROBLEM with USERS:

    They are ignorant, they just need to learn. Main beef I have as a CSR is people expecting me to give third party support, do you think the companies that pay me to make them money want me spending my time giving support for other companies. Stop asking us to help you with other things just because we pickup the phone faster or we are "free" to talk to, suck it up and call them.

    Anonymous said...

    Anonymous said... "as long as people continue to use Windows, Tech support will be around."

    Oh yeah? Ever tried talking an "average user" through a problem on a Linux client? Hah!

    Anonymous said...

    USERS ARE LOSERS.

    Unknown said...

    >I also enjoy the 'I'm a system
    > administrator and I know blah blah
    > blahdy blah' - then why are you
    > calling us?

    Hello, because your product doesn't work?!?

    I'm a developer and system engineer, and I will call tech support. You know why? Because sometimes its a lot easier for someone else to fix something, when I'm busy worrying about the 100 servers at work, and 500,000 lines of custom code you have to keep running.

    In other words, I'm too busy to figure out that you have to reset my cable modem from your cubicle for my internet to come back up.

    Anonymous said...

    My favorite:

    Tech support - "Sir/Maam, I believe we figured out the source of your problems!"

    Eu - "OH yea? Whats that?"

    Tech Support - "We found a loose nut behind the keyboard!"

    In regards to the "2 different types of techs" comment...

    There are many different types of techs and its hard to generalize them in 2 categories...I personally take inbound calls on a daily basis and I dont think my customers are morons..instead, i appreciate my customers who help me make a paycheck. If you had to hire a lawyer to defend you in court than he wouldnt think your a "moron." Its the simple fact that your not trained or educated in that field so why would you be expected to know all?

    Anonymous said...

    This list is the reason why everyone hates "tech support".

    Yes, I've done tech support. I alway tried to be helpful and polite. Now I'm one of the "LOSER USERS" and whenever I call my tech support, which is rare, I get attitude and condescension. More tech people need lesson in how do deal with people far more than any technical training.

    Peter Brown said...

    Anonymous(directly above)

    A nice user who doesn't know what they are doing are not the ones this post is addressed to. It's the other callers that

    "forget their password every Monday"
    "Blame the network for their PC not working"
    "shove their keyboard under the monitor so that it holds down a key, and call helpdesk because their machine is beeping!"

    These are the users I'm talking about.

    Anonymous said...

    Ok one for the users...from my experience (about nVidia GeForce Go 7400 on a Laptop)

    I: Can u plz tell me if this XYZ laptop has a discrete grpahics card?

    TS: Yes the laptop has graphics.

    I: No I mean does it have a "separate" graphics card? Cuz I chkd out ur site n there it says it does but ur print ad in a mag says it doesnt.

    TS: Yes Sir, its does have a graphics card.

    I: Okay great. Can u tell me how much dedicated memory does this card has? U c i jus want to be sure be4 I place an order.

    TS: Sir its got 1GB pre-installed.

    I: Maam, I am talkin about the memory on the graphics card. Is it 128MB or 256MB?

    TS: (a little strained) SIR as I just said, u get 1GB pre-installed.

    I: Maa'm are u even gettin what I m tryin to ask u?

    TS: Absolutely Sir.

    I: I really dont think so. I am askin u about Video Memory & you are talkin about System Memory.

    TS: No Sir. Its an nVidia Card & 1 GB RAM!

    I: You have been very kind. But, is there someone else I can talk to?

    TS: (Condescendingly) Can I put u on hold while I trasfer u to my senior?

    I: Thanks a mil.

    (after 5 mins of wait...)

    TS: (same lady) Thanks for holding Sir. It has 128MB video memory

    I: GREAT. Thanks for the quick response.

    THAT WAS A US TECH SUPPORT!

    Anonymous said...

    "Main beef I have as a CSR is people expecting me to give third party
    support, do you think the companies that pay me to make them money want
    me spending my time giving support for other companies. Stop asking us
    to help you with other things just because we pickup the phone faster
    or we are "free" to talk to, suck it up and call them."Ha, so true. And
    people *hate* it so much when I say they'll have to call Dell or HP,
    because their computer is broken. "I pay you $X every month, you should
    help me!" Um, no, life does not work that way. If you pay a company for
    internet, that doesn't make them your toady for every little thing that
    goes wrong in your life.One lady I got was convinced that her internet
    had broken her monitor. She kept insisting that the monitor was new, so
    it had to be the internet. She even demanded that I do a remote connect
    to her desktop so that I could see how the monitor was behaving. Ah,
    ignorance.Also love the "But it was working earlier
    today/yesterday/etc." It's true, things do work until they break! :D

    Anonymous said...

    @Eric Marden

    It doesn't matter if you're a engineer, etc, whatever...you still called tech support. He is only putting that up there because some people will start their call by saying their an engineer, sys admin, whatever, as if that somehow means we can skip basic troubleshooting or we should be in awe of them. I've had people call saying they are such and such an admin and all they needed to do was plug a cable in.

    Tip to people calling tech support: You're talking to a person, so speak to them the way you would like to be spoken to. Be pleasant and courteous, and respect that the person on the phone probably knows more about the product than you do since they take calls about it all day.

    Anonymous said...

    My best experience was working for a pharmacy call center. I always love it when the person thats call is the person that barely speaks any english.
    Person stated her PC wasn't working. So I found the PC RTO'd and asked the Rx tech if the pc was turned on. I could over hear her ask the pharmasist the same question.

    Pharmasist: "He needs to send someone down, I'm not a mechanic"

    Anonymous said...

    word!

    I'm done with that! lol.

    Anonymous said...

    I did hotline tech support early in my career, ultimately doing it for 8 years at two large companies.

    My faves were the threats:

    "I'll have your job!"
    (Okay, but you'll hate the hours and take a cut in pay.)

    "I'll sue!"
    (You might want to reconsider. In my building alone there are four entire floors of nothing but lawyers.)

    There were more, but I've since forgotten them. :-)

    My co-worker was working a call from a military base, but it was going very slowly and his other calls were backing up. Eventually he got annoyed and said "Listen, you're not the only person calling today, you know...". There was a pause and I watched as he hung up the phone, his face drained of color. I asked what they said. "Maybe not, but I am the only one with tactical nukes."

    Peter Brown said...

    One of my favorites is "Were losing thousands of dollars because of this!!"

    Anonymous said...

    My fav that happened. One of my Helpdesk Employees that was new was talking to a user and was spelling using words S as in Spot, A as in apple, M as in MORON.....

    It was really not funny at the moment as I almost fell backwards out of my chair but it's funny looking back at it.

    Helpdesk Rule #1. Don't call the people that pay you Morons.

    Anonymous said...

    Rule #1.. no users = no jobOf course, that's hard to think about when I run into one of those people who "doesn't know anything about
    computers.. just come fix it". This is usually the reply when I ask
    them background questions like what kind of internet connection do they
    have, or what operating system are they using.Seems to me that if you
    are dependent on PC's to get your work done on a daily basis, you might want to learn a little something about them, or at least put in the effort to help me help you.

    Oh yeah, I had a lady totally freak out one day because I moved an icon on her desktop about 6 inches to the right.. she couldn't find it. Darn near had a nervous breakdown.

    Anonymous said...

    As a former tech support engineer, Ioffer you this advice: If you don't like the answer, hang up and call back.

    Seriously. If your gut feeling is that the engineer has no idea what he is talking about, you're probably right. Don't waste your time on a lost cause. Churn is very high in the tech support field; you probably just got the new guy. If you hang up and dial right away, chances are you won't get the same guy again.

    Peter Brown said...

    absolutely right!

    I used to get whiplash flipping around in my chair to try and shut the new guy up before he said anymore stupid things to the customers!

    Anonymous said...

    true story. Working college tech support a secretary called saying her keyboard didn't work. After figuring out that she used wasp killer instead of compressed air, my coworker asked her in a calm voice if she was trying to de-bug it. Still smile thinking about it.

    Anonymous said...

    "I have people skills. I am good at dealing with people. Can't you understand that? What the hell is wrong with you people?"

    Anonymous said...

    Am I the only person who just flat-out says "It's a user problem"?

    Anonymous said...

    We had one guy in our group whose answer to everything was "Just reboot. If it doesn't clear the problem, call back". So his daily call numbers looked amazing compare to the rest of us. Of course we were catching his call backs and having to take the time to actually FIX the problem.

    >Am I the only person who just flat-out says "It's a user problem"?

    Probably.

    Anonymous said...

    Ever get a customer that tries to repeat what you just explained to them, but mispronounces a word like: "restall" instead of saying "reinstall"? I also get that one where "It was working fine yesterday..." It never ends.

    Michelle "Kenobi" Osorio said...

    Hilarious. Someone at work just forwarded this to me. I direct a new web series all about a group of Help Desk people.
    http://www.shutdowntv.com
    I think there are alot of things you'll find in common with this article. :-o

    Anonymous said...

    I worked in Tech Support as well and this is spot on. Reboot, reboot, reboot is totally true. So is the bit about never let them smell your fear. If in doubt make up a lie about what you think is happening until you can work it out.

    Anonymous said...

    I always try to be polite to the tech support. I really don't even mind when they BS something. I do mind, however, when they deliberately mislead me.

    Example. I boot my laptop to find the black screen saying "Operating system not fount"... frick. So I put in the system restore disk... BEEP... "hard disk not found"... double frick

    So as a last ditch effort, i called tech support from the company where i bought the computer.
    Me: this is what happened, is there anything i can do to recover the data.
    TS: No, not really.
    ME: fine, not surprising really. So will this be covered by my extended warantee program.
    TS:No, this sounds like a software problem, and your warantee only covers hardware. $$$
    ME: So can you explain how, if by definition, software is stored on the hard disk, and the processor can't find the hard disk; is this not a hardware problem.

    Please tech support people, dont try to scam me.

    Anonymous said...

    hmm, i am a network admin. the only reason i call tech support monkeys is so i can get hw replaced. when i get a resistent monkey, i lay it on thick and make the monkey realize just how little (s)he really knows! 3 yrs tech support at dell is why i laugh at ya'll. 6 yrs doing this, get a life.

    Anonymous said...

    hate to be another anonymous...but this tread looks like macho contest...
    ohh I have had 6 years in tech, ohh 15 years in tech...
    ohh i have had 20....no one cares....wow...a network admin.......
    wow...i bow down to you...fact is...it is people like most of you..not all..i am
    not saying that...that gives techs a bad name...think they know
    everything about computers...well...sorry...yes a I am a tech...and
    each time I read these comments I just picture Nick Burns from SNL......

    Peter Brown said...

    This is just a nice fun friendly post. No one here needs to get upset. If it's funny to you enjoy it, if it upsets you, dismiss it please. It's not worth getting bent out of shape for. This is just some mindless support humor I mashed out in a couple of minutes...

    I don't need a vi emacs war here! :)

    Anonymous said...

    anyone who gets mad at the comments made are the same techs that hate every call they have to take. THOSE guys give tech support a bad name. btw, be glad Im out in the corporate world taking care of our enterprise and client level equipment. I DO KNOW WHAT IM DOING, I never bother tech support except for hw failures. monkey or true techie, both should appreciate this fact!

    Peter Brown said...

    I changed the picture and linked to despair.com to quell all the register folks who seem to be on some sort of crusade...

    You win! I'm sorry...honest. :)

    Anonymous said...

    I've been in this business for almost 8 years now, started at helpdesk, and now I'm a systems engineer for a large company. The most important things I learned were that a smile or a kind word will knock any angry person back and get them rational, and that how you act towards people is as important/more important that what you know. We all work in a customer service industry, without customers, we are unemployed. I have gotten people to thank me when their computer was completely rebuilt with no data saved or when I had just charged them $500 for a new system because we couldn't do anything more for their old one. When they love you, you can get away with anything. So please, cut the rediculous ID 10 T crap that they have all heard by now and will hopefully get your manager on the phone for. One final thing, enterprise level support is a delight. They know to call you sir and to ask before suggesting anything. Never had a problem fixed faster than when the tech asked all the right questions and was able to process what I was saying without a manual or script.

    Unknown said...

    First let me say: 30 years tech geek, and I'm only 41!

    Most of my tech support is/was aviation and communications electronic test equipment.

    We had one guy buy a $15K USD communication system monitor (the cheap one), and try to use it for repairing pagers (this was in the early/mid '90s). He kept calling for lessons in rf troubleshooting. He was a dentist, and was doing this as a side business to make a little extra money!

    We bought the unit back from him. He went to college to learn to fix teeth, and we went to learn to fix electronics. We made a deal with him: don't fix electronics and we won't do backroom dentistry.

    Unknown said...

    I have worked in computer support for over 24 years (since before the IBM PC existed) and have since 'floated' up the organizational ladder where ever I have worked. If one of my tech support people said 'reboot' straight up instead of actually diagnosing the problem, I'd have to 'let them go'.

    Anonymous said...

    There are people who actually use emacs? :)

    Anonymous said...

    You people take things WAY too seriously! No wonder you hate your jobs! I do tech support, and granted, I LOATHE alot of the customers that call in, I realize it takes a great sense of humor to do this job day after day.

    Alternatively, it's a third shift thing, you wouldn't understand. :)

    Anonymous said...

    Tech support for a software company.

    Client calls for tech support saying "Your Software does not work", even if the problem is not "Your Software", since they have no clue and no IT department.

    Rule #1: Figure out if it's a User problem. Forgot password, bad configuration.

    Rule #2: Figure out if it's a simple Windows problem.

    Rule #3: Did they reboot the machine?

    Rule #4: Is the ethernet connected?

    Rule #5: Is the printer connected?

    If that does not help, go to Stage 2 and pass the user to a real developper...

    Those 5 basic rules should handle 98% of all service calls.

    Unknown said...

    For those of you that complain about knowing more than the Tech Support Agent that you are calling...
    ::RANT::
    I work tech support for an outsourcing company. I take calls for 50-70 different clients. The training received for some of the proprietary software is less than even mentioning the names. So please do not get mad at the agent. Be angry with the company for not training the agent properly. Thanks for you Time./::RANT::

    Anonymous said...

    Yeah, if I have to hear "I'm losing business over this" one more time...

    IT in general may be one of the only professions where the client thinks you, the IT worker, the tech guy, is worthless. If someone hires a lawyer for a court case, they listen to what the lawyer says, for example. If an accountant advises you on your finances you listen to them, too. But with technology, it becomes "I DON'T HAVE TIME FOR THIS!" or "WHATEVER, I JUST WANT IT TO WORK!"

    I don't expect everyone to care about computers the way I do -- that's why I do this job and they don't. But when they call ME for help and I explain what went wrong and how to fix it, and I'm subjected to dismissive attitudes and grumbles, it's tantamount to saying "The things you spent the last twenty years learning? Yeah, who cares." It's insulting.

    Personally what I'd like to know is why companies continue to hire people who know nothing at all about computers, when the modern business world relies almost entirely on them. If you can't use one competently, you aren't qualified for a job in the business world.

    Peter Brown said...

    > Anonymous said...
    >
    >There are people who actually use >emacs? :)

    Only dinosaurs or babies...

    VIVA LA VI! :)

    Anonymous said...

    My favourite error code was always PEBKAC

    (Problem Exists Between Keyboard And Chair)

    Anonymous said...

    After working "in the field" for something along the lines of 27 years, I have to say that I think Kludge has done a wonderful job of alowing those of us stuck in the front lines a great oppertunity to blow of a bit of steam, and perhaps, a sort of "Dont do THIS" guide to the users out there. I love my work, and working with people. I've learned to be calm, and collected, and even to put up with amazing things. Why fuss and fued over it so? Way to go, Kludge!

    Anonymous said...

    "The problem seems to be your keyboard actuator..."

    Anonymous said...

    "Zillah said... Alternatively, it's a third shift thing, you wouldn't understand. :)"

    yeh baby! 3rd shift rules! did for about two years at Dell...complete autonomy and 3rd shift diff

    as for some of the other comments since my last one. Just wanted to recommend checking the attitude. another anonymous commenter is correct, we are in the services industry. Without the "people skills" do you really think your knowledge is worth the pay you get? The only ppl I know who get away with an introverted or superiority complex are techs who work in on backend hardware and software, who have zero contact with the end users. That being said, I never hired a tech like that at all the places I have worked at.

    Anonymous said...

    I used to work general IT for a small organization. Usually by the time I called tech support, I knew what the problem was and just needed to get hardware replaced. In one particular case, I diagnosed a dead power supply. Once I got a tech on the line, I told him all the symptoms and requested a replacement. He apologized and explained that he still needed to go through troubleshooting steps with me. I have never been more glad that I didn't get impatient with someone, because the first thing he told me to check was the "small red switch on the back next to the power cord, that says 110/220 on it."

    Me: "...oh. I didn't think to check that."
    I never figured one my users would manage to switch a PS voltage selector. It's not like those can get bumped.

    I learned that even those of us that know what we're doing can overlook stuff, and it's best to be patient with tech support, because there's a reason they have to go through the checklists.

    Anonymous said...

    Hehe, I had always heard PIBKAC as PEBSAK (Problem Exists Between Seat and Keybord). Learn something new everyday!

    I still do some tech support, and run into users who shouldn't be allowed within 100 yards of a computer, but they don't bother me. Those are the users that keep tech support employed; the ones who will not (or cannot) improve upon their rudimentary knowledge of computers. God bess 'em, I say!

    Stephanie said...

    I loved the list - this comment section is a little overwhelming to me though - wow! Makes my comment seem well . . . . .

    Anonymous said...

    In every tech support group you will find techs that know what they are doing and techs that have no idea.
    The same goes for the users. There are some users that know what they are doing and what the problem is, and of course there are the ones that they should only be allowed to use typewriters ...
    The users that know what they are doing make my life much easier and the ones that don't keep my job safe. :)

    Anonymous said...

    Been in the computer business on the hardware side of things for a good 20 years, been on both sides of the tech support phone call. I found this article humorous in the light that it was given.

    While most of the comments were little more than venting, some of them were well thought out and offered some good advice for dealing with people.
    you have to keep in mind that when someone calls tech support they are allready frustrated and prob more than a little angry, the best advice I give my new techs is... let them vent, then HELP them. and by God you'd better have good phone manners. They are paying customers, they are not your friends, you are not on first name terms, "Sir/Ma'am"," Please" and "Thank you" go a long way.

    ok.. getting off my soap box now..
    Dave Smith
    IT Manager

    Anonymous said...

    user: Hi helpdesk, i have a problem with my internet access.

    helpdesk: how can i help?

    user: i got a screenshot, can i have your e-mail address so that i can sent it to you.

    Anonymous said...

    If... "Substance abusers and computer operators are the only folks called Users"...does that mean everyone calling Tech Support is a druggie? You keep referring to the people calling as Users.

    Peter Brown said...

    Jon-

    Try not to think about it too much. The list isn't designed to withstand too much analysis...

    Anonymous said...

    Wonderful.
    I have been a user for a while. I have done some tech support from home and have experienced much of what was described.

    My advice for tech support: Please keep your cool. We all have seen some just plain stupid people in our lives. Don't lead people in directions where you can just laugh at them. (Although some humor is definitely a part of the job.)

    My advice for users: Be polite. Know that tech support doesn't know everything. (But they can find out, from the others nearby.)

    Anonymous said...

    My standard answer to what the problem was:
    -"There was a leak in the data pump."
    Works every time.

    Anonymous said...

    ovid-

    i feel like we're in tron...
    i've never seen people talk about "users" for so long :D

    Anonymous said...

    I had a customer call in very upset about the slow speeds of his connection. He was convinced someone was "stealing his connection." I started troubleshooting only to discover his MAC address wasn't even on the wireless tower...he was connecting to his neighbor's internet service.

    Another favorite was the lady who couldn't connect to the internet on her laptop. I asked her, if she hadn't already, to reboot her router. She made a comment "Okay I just have to find a flashlight." Upon further investigation I discovered her power was out and her laptop was running off the battery.

    Peter Brown said...

    SJ-

    Thanks! I almost missed you there! Isn't this wild?!

    Peter Brown said...

    Anonymous-

    I just re-added Tron to my netflix...I need a refresher...

    "Tron speaks for the users!"

    Stephanie said...

    Beyond Wild - - - -

    Anonymous said...

    used to work as tech support for AOL (looking back I should have shot myself in the face rather than take that job) and I can without a doubt say the users and the company are about as bad as you can get.
    As techs we had to keep an average call time under 9-7 mins depending if it was broadband or dialup. Which meant give the user the first fix in the flow chart and get them off the phone as fast as possible. AOL doesn't care if their software works or not. If we were on the phone for 15 mins or longer our managers would tell us to wrap it up and if you consistently had high call times you were fired. No concern was given for the customer.

    I won't even go into my dumb user stories, but I've heard it all, from not plugged in to the install CD inserted upside down. "No, sir the shiny side goes down down."

    Anonymous said...

    "umm, I think the problem is somewhere between your screen and the back of your chair.."

    Anonymous said...

    Every time I get US TS my call is handled perfectly, any other country (eg India) and it's quite a bit more difficult. Since I generally know what I'm doing I "always" spell out exactly what the problem is and I get a pleasant and effective conversation.

    takumi said...

    thanks... u've made my day.. :)

    I've been in the industry for 6 yrs now. its true there are a lot of good and bad tech support ppl out there. unfortunately, most the techs now days are just reading off a script...i find it easier to just 'act dumb' and let the tech support person go through their script -- so at least i wont be confusing them... :P

    Anonymous said...

    The thing is that tech support is 90% people skills and 10% tech skills. Most support people have 90% tech skill and 10% people skill. The only way for them not to lose face is to brag about their technical skills and make the user feel like a complete idiot.

    Anonymous said...

    I think I am seeing another pattern here, alot of frontline techs telling their stories...that is only a one sided conversation and opinion. Once you are Level 3 support and/or have a project manager/IT manager role, you get a better picture of why policy and procedure is set up the way it is, why call times are set as such. for example, the call times were around 9-10 minutes in GTS at dell. After I got off L1 support and moved up to L3/TAM, i got to see what my averages were, 6min per call, including soft and hard calls for a 1 year period.

    Just know that if you are in tech support as a level 1/frontline tech, be ready to have a boring job with stability, if you are good at dealing with ppl on the phone all day long.

    On the other hand, once you get into a hands on position, you can't get away from the people/communication skills. It is more difficult to deal with people, face to face, than it is to deal with them over the phone.

    Sys

    Anonymous said...

    There are 3 types of caller in tech support:

    1. the rare person who knows what they are doing

    2. the not-so-rare troglodite who is willing to listen and learn

    3 the all too common idiot who couldn't find their arse with both ahnds and a map and has an ego the size of canada.

    I like 2, I LOVE 1, unfortunate all I seem to get is 3,3,3,3,3,3,3,3

    Anonymous said...

    I once had a caller who called asking why he can't surf the Net even after he paid his overdue bills. I told him account reactivation are not done on weekends, he has to wait till Monday.

    He cried..

    Anonymous said...

    Sounds like an organic interface error.

    Anonymous said...

    I highly recognize the thruth in your words :)

    "My display is blank"
    "Do you have plug-in the cord ?"
    "What ? Come on please :)"

    or do anything you can do even if you don't know what you are doing as seems the user don't think you are a looser, always give him an answer :)

    Good job!

    Merci!

    Anonymous said...

    LINUX WILL NEVER REPLACE WINDOWS BECAUSE DRIVER INSTALLATION IS LIKE USUING DOS. GOOGLE IS YOUR FRIEND.

    I WORK FOR AN ISP AND I GUESS AM A MONKEY. BUT FOR SOME REASON US FRONTLINE SOLDIERS SEEM TO KNOW WHATS WRONG ON THE BACKEND BEFORE THE ENGINEERS AND ADMINS. EVERYONE HAS A ROLE AND A PLACE EVEN THE OLD LADIES YOU HAVE TO TEACH HOW TO TYPE CMD IN A TEXT BOX.

    Peter Brown said...

    Caps lock stuck?

    Anonymous said...

    I do tech support on a callout basis and spend half the time sorting out what people on the other end of telephones have told people to do. It tends to be a mixture of people getting fobbed off with "reboot" (I'm not sure this has ever fixed a problem). Or, people half way through some ridiculously complicated, long winded process that wont fix the problem anyway (finding someone with a blank windows desktop and no holiday photo backups is not fun).

    Unknown said...

    I started out as a CSR at a small ISP and worked my way up to 3rd level, Now I work as 3rd level at a corporate gig. and I have a great story that keeps me laughing to this day...

    When I was at the ISP I was troubleshooting a customers internet connection (DSL) and I was being thorough as DSL can be finiky after about 10 minutes I realised asked her if the computer was on and she replied "No the power is out due to the storm" I can not believe I did not pick up on that sooner.

    Love the Artical though! Kudos

    Andrew Bean
    Incident Management Specialist

    Anonymous said...

    I don't work tech support, but I know about ten people who do. Anytime they have a bad day, I offer them a job working with me. I am a telemarketer (my company does mortgage refinance). I sympathize with you tech supporters and I love you. So on those days when you have a sys. admin. on your line and he is challenging you, just think about how terrible it would be if you had to call him and offer help instead of being called. At least some of you guys can always say, "We are technical support, if you want customer service you have to dial...." ;)

    me, the drama queen said...

    do you know WLAN cabels? or windows FIESTA???
    i didn't ...the useful users thought me that they exist!!

    Anonymous said...

    Customers only know how to say

    "I want to speak to your supervisor"

    Our customer have a certain programming in their head

    if(Supervisor_not_around)
    {

    speak_to_Manager();

    }
    else

    abuse_the_agent_until_you_get_Support();

    Anonymous said...

    Funny..

    A customer was spelling out his address and said "Q" as in "Cucumber"

    Anonymous said...

    I have a joke :

    One my my customer was having an internet issue.

    Cx claims that he has a wireless router and a connection to the router using a cable to the laptop.

    After troubleshooting for 5 mins, I found that he did not have an IP.

    Guess what? The Router was an actually an AC Adaptor =)

    Unknown said...

    In response to Brent, I had a customer bring his PC in, because 'this modem doesn't work.' When he didn't manage to get online, he checked all the cables at the back of the PC, where he spotted the 110-220 volt switch. Figuring it somehow had got switched to the wrong setting, he switched it 'back' to 110 volts while plugged in to the UK's mains voltage of 220. Cooked the whole damn thing, maybe the floppy drive survived, certainly not much else.

    Another customer brought in his monitor. It had been misbehaving and his neighbour who of course, 'knows a bit about computers',(They are very common, aren't they ?), had a look at it. 'Hey this 15-pin VGA plug has a pin missing. I'll put a new one on there for you!' (What did he think, the VGA port had EATEN a pin !?)And he chopped the plug off. Only to discover that you can't just pick up a replacement in your local High Street. Not if you don't know where to go, or what you are doing.
    Needless to say, we had to break the news (without stifling the laughter - this was face-to face) that the cost of repair was more than the cost of the monitor, and the original fault would still be there.

    And on another topic, in the UK at least, it's 'Bare-faced lie'.

    And great list, Kludge, thank you v much !

    Anonymous said...

    A the smart tech support guy's, never mind why you all hurdle around but it has nothing to do with your product, or that nice manual no no it has nothing to do with that

    Anonymous said...

    OLIE = Organic Life-form Interface Error

    Anonymous said...

    thats all great, but until u put a user on hold to "research the issue" and then just go to the mcdonalds down the street...u havent lived.

    ps. nearly as awesome is when they ask if they shud accept the eula, make them read it out loud to u.

    Anonymous said...

    i find vicodin and/or percocet makes dealing with customers a lot easer.

    Anonymous said...

    You guys are all crazy...

    Thank god for them or we wouldn't have a job. That's what the mute\hold button is for. What does your car mechanic\accountant\lawyer do when you call him and can't explain your problem? Sends you a bill........

    To miss the India call, wait until the time zone changes....

    Anonymous said...

    -as for the guys who are referring to corporate internal helpdesk and
    are all " I'm going to complain to your manager and he's going to have a chat with you - blah blah" ...most service desk managers will take our side 98% of the time since:
    1. they probably had to do the same thing before getting to manage so they know how stupid some people are.
    2. they also know how much every other dept int he company will love to blame IT for their lack of planning or work ethic.

    I also used to work in ISP support and that is the worst. Having to support people that are already pissed off for having to wait for 2 hours before talking to you is not pleasant and have heard many a person *CRY* on the phone due to bad support or jacked up automated billing.Sadly, I would also hear a lot of "Thank God, you're an American!" , after hearing my voice. I would do my best but a lot of issues are so hard to fix without some kind of remote access due to the fact that you have to walk them through it.

    Anonymous said...

    To Quote Bill Cosby, "The same think happens every night."

    As an ISP customer service support tech, I start my shift every day with a clean mindset. (I'm going to listen, and have constructive dialogue, and I'm going to HELP the customer).

    Then, around 5 minutes to an hour after my shift starts, I get a call from a customer with a PC issue that is beyond my demarcs, (an issue that I am not trained by the company for or authorized to troubleshoot). If I know how to fix the problem, I will usually help them anyway, but when I don't I let them know that I don't and they usually don't want to hear that.

    The customer will insist the company is responsible for his issue and instruct me to fix it. I used to argue with the customer, but now I just say, "Ok, I understand, let me take a look at that problem. I'm going to put you on hold for a second and research your problem. I'll be right back".

    2 to 3 minutes later I go back on the phone with them. They have fixed thier own problem much of the time. If they haven't, I have them try SOMETHING, (like restart the computer, ect.) If that doesn't work, at least they usually are better prepared to believe that I really do want to help them, and I am unable to at that point. I give them the number to thier hardware manufacturer or Geek Squad. They thank me and hang up, (or just hang up)

    It's what me and my friends call, "The MAGIC of CHECKITY HOLD"

    Anonymous said...

    hello...this...is...tech...support...

    Um, hi. This is Bill in Hicksville. Could you tell Craig that our modem bank is locked up again? I get nothing but busy signals. He'll know what I mean.

    what...operating...system...are...you...using

    Could I speak to Craig, please?

    what...operating...system...are...you...using

    You don't need to know that. I need to speak with Craig and tell him the modem bank in Hicksville needs to be rebooted again, OK?

    what...operating...system...are...you...using

    I...won't...tell...you...may...I...speak...to...Craig?

    how...can...I...help...you...if...you...won't...tell...me...what...operating...system...are...you...using

    You can help me by letting me speak with Craig. Could I talk to Craig, please?

    what...operating...system...

    Could I please speak to Craig please? Now?

    I...will...transfer...you...to...a...supervisor...please...hold...for...Craig...

    (sigh) Thank you.

    Anonymous said...

    The above post is the stupidest thing I've ever heard, most call centres have hundreds of agents how do you expect someone to transfer you to someone when asking by first name. Besides when you first call the agent is supposed to do everything to help you before passing to a buys supervisor. That was terrible, well the again it's Hicksville lol.

    Tyson said...

    This whole hing is just hilarious!

    Unknown said...

    I may have missed it, but a real peeve I had when I did tech support was that I did know how to fix a customer's problem, the problem was related to use of our internet service, yet it was outside of our "support boundaries". Apparently someone higher up thought some problems just took too long to fix, and should be pawned off on someone else.
    Another annoyance, to me as well as the customer, was when I knew a likely cause for the problem, but "Quality Assurance" (what an oxymoron) required me to go through a meaningless list of scripted responses and customer instructions first. That list could be skipped if I felt lucky that day, and didn't think someone was listening in to the call, making bad performance reviews for failure to ask meaningless questions.

    So, don't suppose your tech is an idiot. His/her managers may be.

    Anonymous said...

    Regarding the "I-D-10-T error"...

    The 90's called, and they want their joke back.

    Anonymous said...

    Great post, I love it.
    kludge keep it up. To all who are claiming to be Net Admin and high up IT guy's. Listen to this, you could be a CEO now and have worked a million years in tech suport but you forgot! "Your fly is open, zip it up" or a tech will tell you that.

    Anonymous said...

    This is a great site. Thank you for your information. I THANK YOU I SALUTE YOU IT,S A AMZING SITE.

    Tim Biden said...

    That is hilarious! Though I don't lie to my clients I sometimes think they would rather hear something other than the problem was a user error. Especially when I have to tell the same thing repeatedly.

    I've got to read more of your blog!

    Anonymous said...

    "I've spent a lot of time, trying to persuade users that I *do* know what I'm talking about... Sometimes they take the fake answers so much more readily!"

    Funny, as an engineer, the first thing that always comes to mind when I hear this is "if you really knew what you were doing, you wouldn't be in tech support."

    Anonymous said...

    "
    kludge keep it up. To all who are claiming to be Net Admin and high up IT guy's. Listen to this, you could be a CEO now and have worked a million years in tech suport but you forgot! "Your fly is open, zip it up" or a tech will tell you that."

    Or we may actually work in the industry, rather than customer service... I mean support.

    rslygh said...

    Flux capacitor and mouse server both made me laugh harder than the blog post. Still, pretty funny

    Anonymous said...

    Some of the points I agree with you. Anyways 20 things helpful. Thanks

    Ricki said...

    Nice blog. I've added it to my favourites.

    I have also started a new IT Support Blog. You can check it out here.

    Thanks again for an interesting read.

    Anonymous said...

    Never tell any customer to type "[expletive that rhymes with truck] you" into any text box. I learned this the hard way.

    Anonymous said...

    The toughest situation I have to deal with is when the situation is clearly the customer's fault, it is caused by pure ignorance, and they want to know the cause of the problem. Those are the only times I've had to "fib" and say it was the system's fault.

    There's nothing worse than the "how did the pr0n-spewing virus get on my computer" question.

    Andrew said...

    Wow, some of you have had really outlandish computer users. But, as to the list, there are some valid points on the list, and I've certainly had my share of problems with explaining things to customers. But every place I've worked tech has been a walking environment, and that makes some of these things impossible(it also works as a great example of the statement "users can smell fear". When the user is there in person, and you start to get that panicked expression, they know, they know.

    Aileen said...

    Hell. Really? Its so hard to be a tech support especially when the customer whose calling knows many things about the topic.

    Peter Brown said...

    Aileen-

    This isn't a link library.

    Anonymous said...

    Oh, God, man I'm a tech supporter.
    How truthfull you are. GREAT!!!

    Sean said...

    I've just started work in ISP Tech Support. Can't say i'm really looking forward to it after reading this!

    Great post though :)

    Anonymous said...

    I used the try to work the user like a hand puppet to diagnose their problems. This usually ended up like trying to knit a blanket by remote control - a huge mess. THEN I find they haven't backed up their database in 3 years.... and then I get blamed for the data loss. Now I've learned: immediately demand they locate their backup files. If none exist, I offer to sell them a software update/upgrade, since they're screwed anyway and there is no way I'm catching hell for their laziness. At the very least they can show an "upgrade" to "prevent" this in the future.

    Remove, reboot, reload, restore. Anything else is setting yourself up for a s4itty diaper in YOUR face...

    dell support said...

    As a tech support, it''s nice to have a feeling that customers appreciated your work.

    William said...

    I noticed someone said they were entering into tech support and worried because of what they see here. Don't worry. You get a lot of tech support folks that like to pretend the job is hard. I have been in tech support off and on for over 15 years. I have met some great people in my job. This is only about 1% of the people you deal with in tech support. The other 99% are usually great and want to listen. But of course it depends on YOUR attitude as much as any.

    tecris said...

    So true. At least based on my experiences as ex-tech support tech. Well, customers need to do their share too unless they think technicians are magicians and mind-readers.

    Peter Brown said...

    I will delete all phishing and SPAM comments. So don't even waste your time...

    tryanmax said...

    Someone named efe told about a person who's laptop screen broke and they claimed "it just happened." While they probably were lying, no BS, that did totally happen to me once. I lifted the lid and, right before my eyes, I watched the screen split from corner to corner!

    I'm willing to think that maybe one of my roommates did something to it while I was away. But the screen did not split until I lifted the lid. Incredible!

    Christophe Rivot said...

    Thanks for making me laught! lol

    Shawn Michaels said...

    Thanks for taking the time to discuss this, I feel strongly about it and love learning more on this topic. If possible, as you gain expertise, would you mind updating your blog with more information? It is extremely helpful for me. BY - technical support process

    Unknown said...

    Good Work.. Really helpful!

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