The Abused

What is it about tension that makes people bite their nails? I don't understand. It's not like it accomplishes anything at all, besides more discomfort. Freud has some theory on this, but personally I don't care. I'm sure anything Freud had to say would make me feel even worse about myself than any amount of nail biting would.

Lucky for me, I am a guy and no one really cares how my nails look. It's more that I just don't get it. I mean I don't start chewing at my elbow or gnawing on my knee whenever I'm on edge, so why attack the poor harmless nail?

It's not his fault I can't make something work. He didn't schedule three appointment at the same hour all in completely opposite directions. In the fact the only thing he did, was be useful. He's there when I need him for a can of soda, opening DVD cases or helping me wire cable.

Life with nub nails is a painful life at best. It's amazing how often you use them, and how sensitive skin can be after being shielded for so long by a nail. I now wince at every keystroke and jumped twice yesterday while trying to replace the double-a's in one of my child's toys.

It will do you well to recall this, next time you decide to take out your nervous energy out on something smaller and weaker than you. Because in the end what does the nail get for all his years of useful servitude? Pain and misery every time I get uncomfortable. So if you are ever feeling low and put upon, consider the hardworking, under appreciated, and overly abused fingernail. Life as a nail, really bites.

9 comments:

Missy said...

At least you don't bite your toenails, now that says something about tension!

Windy City Survivors said...

Ahh, my poor fingernails. I never thought of it from their perspective! :) Stress and biting nails just seems to go hand in hand.

Ando said...

Don't you love it when you cut, or bite, them too short so the end of your finger hurts so bad you can feel your heartbeat in it?

SJ said...

It was a horrible habit I had in elementary and Jr. High - it all came to an end when a "popular" guy in high school said something - and I was horrified - put an end to the habit -

Unfortunately - now I eat when I am stressed - - - -

kludge said...

Missy-

Uh, yeah...and something about your breath. Of course you would need to be fairly limber to boot!

kludge said...

WCS-

It's just like kicking the cat, it feels good to transfer tension...

...I just need a better method, like cleaning or something.

kludge said...

Ando-

"My finger has a heartbeat!" -Elf

No, in fact my thumb is still recovering from watching Glory Road. I'm almost down to the hand joint!

kludge said...

SJ-

Wow, well lesson learned, good for you!

I'm just not like that, I'll fight the humiliation and pain to keep up my bad habits!

BTW If you run out of chips, buffalo dip is also good with crackers, pickles, French bread, cheese...

Missy said...

I liked Glory Road, it's one of those movies, even though you know they are going to win, just still hanging on the edge of your seat, just like Apollo 13, even though I remember when they were rescued...oh I am old, but boy I love the movies!!!