Network Engineer: How People See Me

There is a new meme going around. How people see me, here's the one I just did.

Let me know what you think, or do one for yourself! Here's a blank template for you. It's pretty fun.


In the middle of February Patricia and I went on a FauxCation. We knew we couldn't get away for any period of time, but thought we might enjoy some time off while the younglins were in school. Add to that a brilliant showing by my inlaws offering to take two sick girls all day and night Friday and we even managed to stay in a hotel one night.

It was quite relaxing. During our Friday and Saturday we teamed up with Patricia's sister and her husband for a jaunt into San Francisco. It's a city that we've been to many, many times. This time though, we decided to go as tourists and see what oddities we could find.

First was a trip to the Exploratorium at The Palace of Fine Arts.
We pushed grade school kids on field trips aside and tried our hands at all the science exhibits they had to offer. Then I saw this..

Next we took a drive down Lombard street. Apparently my sister-in-law had never done that, as she was hanging out the window of the car while we were driving down Lombard street yelling to Patricia to slow down so she could get a picture. This aroused the tourist who then started taking pictures of us. Her husband responded to this by sticking his head out the window and yelled to the onlookers that we were locals and that everything was cool.

After we all regained our composure... we found our selves here: Coit Tower.

The view was impressive.

Out front is Christopher Columbus. See that in his left hand? Some local decided that Columbus needed a Diet Coke. Unopened. After his voyage I'm sure he appreciated it.

The nastiest looking but best tasting, raw, gluten-free, vegan stack food you can over pay for at Whole Foods. Yum...

Kale Kruch was good, but real food was needed too. Pub Grub. Fish & Chips, Mushy Peas, Boston Bibb Salad, and IPA. Lunch is done!

We then padded down to Ghirardelli Square for something sweet. While browsing through toys in a shop I met a die-hard Star Wars fan. She looked at me and said, "I'd like to show you something special" This is was I got!

Those are light saber tattoos. She claims the experience was extremely painful and unpleasant. I can only imagine. Another fantastic quote from Star-Wars girl, "My living room is done in Star Wars, Batman and leopard print. The boyfriend has to adjust." Freaking Awesome.

We started Saturday with a 2 1/2 hour tour of AT&T park. I have to say, I wouldn't know a baseball stat if in got in bed with me, but I completely enjoyed the tour. My brother in law on the other hand, could have given the tour himself and was extremely happy with our choice of venues for the morning!

Hanging in the Press Box.

Chilling on the field.

And my personal favorite. A lonely Cubs clock hanging in the Giants club house. Slowly ticking away it's time until another chance for a pennant comes its way...

After that we went to pier 39. It was pigeon kicking season and were in top shape. Seriously. The sheer number of pigeons was insane. People were screaming all around us and a unlucky patron eating her clam chowder in a sourdough bread bowl had a little "extra flavoring" from one of the flying beasties. I sympathized with her as I giggled and covered my bowl with my hand...

The last picture I leave you with is a crowd surrounding a local band, belting our their odd SF funky sound while sporty that musical instrument of legend. The Keytar!

Is There Pork in Heaven?

Suggestion by QueenBear: "Why don't you tell us what happens to people when they die? Do their spirits stay with us? Or are they in some other dimension where they don't have anything to do with us? Or do we just turn to dirt? What do you think?"

Thanks for the question! We've all heard stories of ghost sightings and strange occurrences regarding the great beyond. Houses where people swear they are haunted by the spirit of a soul unwilling to ascend into heaven. Seems strange to me a soul not willing to climb the steps to the pearly gates in order to remain on this mortal plane, and then it occurred to me. The truth of it depends on a single question, "Is there any pork in heaven?"

We all know that Jesus said that his Father was busy making houses for us in heaven. Apparently it wasn't only his Earthly dad that was a carpenter, but also his heavenly one. This means that if we're game then we have digs in heaven. Golden mansions in a perfect world. Considering God's other creations it should be pretty boss up there... where ever that may be.

But we also know that Man was created after God's own image and that the Jewish people are Gods chosen people. We also know that Orthodox Jews don't eat cloven toes animals, a category that three of my favorite animals are included in; the ham animal, the sausage animal and the bacon animal. That of course begs that next question... is God down with pork? Maybe that's why he outlawed it among his people.

"This one is no good."

"What do you mean God, this animal is perfect. Eve and I love the pig!"

"No. It's too good, too much flavor and possibilities. It's banned, off the list. Got it?"

"Okay... What are we going to do with all these?"

"You can keep them around in case we need to send an evil spirit into it or something..."

I know that the possibilities of the lack of bacon topside one of my primary concerns and so I figure it's something on the minds of all my readers. Lets delve further into this...

We know that in the book of Acts Peter claimed a vision that told him it was cool to eat pigs. Something that apparently was a bit of a shock to him. In addition it told him it was cool to dine with Gentiles which was even more of a shock. Peter had a lot of crazy ideas (yeah I kind of liked him) including going Van Gogh on some soldiers ear and hanging to death by his feet. (not my first pick method of leaving this world)

So the question is, was Peter right and did God say he was fine with the idea, or was Peter just smelling some amazing pork BBQ at the Centurions house and had an episode? I don't rightly know. (as you can probably guess, theology has never been my strong suit) I would like to believe that even if God didn't like pork, lamb, goat or other unclean animals he would suffer us having them. Sort of like the way vegetarians all look down at us critter crunchers but still will dine with us.

So that's what I think. People go to heaven, and hopefully when we get there we can have pork chops, apple sauce and a big hunk of leavened bread.

Will Work For Posts

I need to post to get the last post off the top but I haven't got much to talk about. This blog has never been a journal, and I don't intend it to become that. This has alway been a place for me to share my most ridiculous ideas and a place for me to try and be creative.

So posting that I'm not eating much, working hard or engaged in politics just doesn't cut it.

I haven't had any new ideas either. So here we are again for like the gazillionth time where I petition for your ideas.

Here's the plan: You post a simple idea and I pledge to make 300 words from it. If I fail you win, if I succeed you have something to read. Deal?

Let er rip...