Beware The Internet

I work with a mild mannered software programmer who bears a striking resemblance in name and image to a guitarist from the 80's rock band Hans Naughty. Mark rarely is seen sporting his abs or bandanna though, so it's hard to be sure.


Beware of simplicity. You might just get burned

Office Crossbow

Long hold times with Symantec have left me with a certain amount of "free time" this afternoon... It works pretty well, though I did smash the ever living daylights out of my knuckle!

Our office "Safety Coordinator" was the one that gave me the idea (mine was built from her design and hers' was designed from here.) I added the handle, and the binder-clip saddle which makes it much more usable!

She later came in and supplied me with projectiles. Chopsticks! Already put a hole in the wall, so yea, it works good!

Signs Of The Time 3

Oddly enough, this place is never crowded...

We should get these for San Francisco...

Begin reality!

A shimmer of hope here!

For those who need to know...

Bargin hunters!

Another blow for political correctness!

Who really reads these things anyway...

The police raid on the premises was not wholly unexpected...


Signs of The Time 1
Signs of the Time 2
Signs of the Time 4


My latest diversion...

Stranded on an island by a torrential storm, you're an outsider in a world ripped apart by powers not of this world. Yeah, the typical RPG setup. Lone stranger here to save the world, nothing new there. Whatever the recipe it's still fun to play a new game. It's been a while and this one is a fun distraction. I know it's good when I dream about it.

"Sleep well?"

"Gnomes stole my bastard sword."

"If I had been given a million years, I would have never guessed those would be your first words to me this morning."

"In 11.5 hours I can play my game again"

"Looks like another full blown addiction..."

In the game you can either join up with the likes of the criminal underworld of the Don, or choose to throw in with the tyrannical leadership of the Inquisition. Not much of a choice for someone who always plays Lawful Good in RPG's

I'm currently on a path that is supportive of the tyrants. The game has a fairly hazy morality to it and it's hard to know which way to go. I figure I'll side with the law for now. We'll see about how my allegiances hold throughout the game. Either way, if you like killing boars, collecting priceless artefacts, forging swords, mining iron ore and abusing your absurd amounts of power then Risen is worth the money.

Here's the trailer, enjoy.

On Helpdesk

Today I am on help desk. It is a little weird. I have not been on front line phone support for many many years.

For the last 5 years I've been the Senior Network Engineer
6 years ago I was Network Engineer
8 years ago I was Junior Engineer
10 years ago I was a helpdesk tech for an ISP

So when I got the e-mail that most of the helpdesk would be out this week, I cried. But just a little, so I could pass it off as allergies in case anyone should happen upon me in my office cave. I popped a Benadryl, filled up my Cisco coffee mug and dawned my helpdesk headset. It's sure to get interesting as I've decided to adopt a hard line with the callers today.

"Helpdesk, this is Peter"
"This is Peter"
"Is Chris there?"
"He's on vacation all week"
"Well...Is Christine there?"
"Nope. She's out too."
"How about Craig?"
"He has Mondays off."
"Can I help you?"
"Maybe I'll call back later."
"Sounds good."

What she doesn't realize is when she calls back, it will still be me. Actually the network team is manning helpdesk this week. Me, my manager and another network tech. Three network people responsible for your printer queues and application errors. For the record, network guys don't do spreadsheets.

"Helpdesk, this is Peter"
"I have a problem with Excel."
"Call back and hope you get my manager, otherwise Google is your friend."
"Sorry, for the substandard support but it's time you learned to use your applications help index anyway."

Reset passwords? Yea... that gets old pretty fast.

"Helpdesk, this is Peter"
"I need a password reset"
"No problem. I reset your password to 'cthulhu.'"
"excuse me?"

I have had some normal calls. Spyware, broken mouse, errors in M$ Office. I actually had one person call me because she couldn't open a picture file.

"Helpdesk, this is Peter"
"I can't open a jpg."
"Seriously, we're very busy here."
"It's work related!"
"Okay...Umm, is that you holding a .22?"
"No. It's a BB gun."

So that pretty much sums up the rest of my week. Oh crap. I hear the phone ringing...

"Helpdesk, this is Peter..."

Sneezing My Brains Out

Sneezing My Brains Out

I'm sneezing my brains out
All over my screen
I'm turning my pixels
To yellow and green

I'm sneezing my brains out
And I've run out of tissue
With a near brimming trash can
My co-workers take issue

"We're going to get sick
While you sit there and sneeze!"
Well it isn't a cold
It's those beautiful trees

The purples and crimsons
And violets of spring time
They're killing me off
Slashed< down in my prime

Sneezing My Brains Out
My nose is a beacon
So raw and so red
Like old drunk Topekan

I'm sneezing my brains out
There's nothing to do.
At least if I die
I'll have fun while I do.

-Peter Brown 2010