Having a baby changes your life. If your not aware of that take a moment and let it sink in. Things you used to take for granted, like leaving the house, will now take 4 hours longer. It’s not just, grab your coat, keys, shoes and go. Now it’s a bit more complicated.
- Locate the child (the younger the child, the easier)
- Start to pack their bag
- Stop them from eating the wet wipes from the package
- Pack, food, change of clothing (warm clothing, and cooler clothing), toys, pacifier, blanket, wet wipes, changing mat, diapers, forget something… (this part is easy)
- Stop them from removing all equipment from packed diaper bag
- Put on your shoes
- Distract child who keeps uniting your shoe laces. Make faces, tie laces
- Grab child
- Forget coat, and diaper bag
- Lock door, close door
- Strap child in their car seat
- Realize your keys are locked in the house, with coat and diaper bag
- Weep openly till neighbors call police
My boss was telling me last week about a consultant that would come into your house and for 2-3 hours walk around on his hands and knees. He did this to outline all the potential hazards in your home. I can only imagine being more paranoid than I am. I have a picture in my head of me taking the belt sander to all my cherry furniture, and rounding all the edges, putting foam bumpers on all wall corners, or spraying down the house with disinfectant every hour. No thanks; I'm crazy enough as it is. I'll live with the steeplechase, for now, but when they start walking, I'm buying them each a body bubble.