Doing Its Bidding

I am here to do the A/Cs' bidding. I would do almost anything it wanted. If it asked me to kill a man I would refrain, more than likely. I suppose if it said, it would stop working if I didn’t commit murder, I would be hard pressed to not act against the poor soul it selected. I hope it wouldn't pick someone I knew personally. That could get awkward

I can’t imagine that the A/C will ask me to do anything sinister for a bit. It would rather gain my trust first, then comes the blackmail. Our air conditioning unit has not been functional for more than a year. I suppose that it hasn’t worked properly since we lived in this house. Some of that is just because it is old, and some of that is my fault.

The A/C unit is a Coleman Presidential II. The idea of it makes me laugh. It is an older junky A/C hanging on for dear life. The opinion that a president would be seen within a mile of it is a joke. Or that they would be so smitten with this model they would want a sequel! I suppose if I was a president and did have two air conditioning units I wouldn’t want this one to be my first. On further reflection he could just be president of a failing delicatessen, or more likely the president of a thriving hot dog stand. Regardless...

When we first moved here in January of 04 some critter crawled in under our house. It’s an unusual experience, one I don’t need to repeat it order to know I didn’t enjoy it. After our guest left I found the hole leading in, right were the A/C’s pipes were going into the foundation. I found a bag of dirt and filled up the hole. Two days later I looked at the bag – Quickrete. After our one hundred degree day we finally decided to have someone look at the old Presidential II. The technician took one look at my pile of hardened concrete on his precious copper pipes, and left. We paid him fifty dollars for his poor attitude and lingering smell.

I spent an hour in ninety-degree heat chiseling away concrete from copper tubing very carefully. We called another A/C repairperson and within twenty minutes time and a few pounds of freon everything was working. It has only been two days since we've been back to a regulated tempature and I cannot imagine life without it. So as I say, I’m here do it’s bidding. Just don’t get it mad, because I would hate to have to kill you off.