20 Rules Of Halloween Etiquette

Fernando over at Picando Codigo and I were going to attempt another joint "20 Things I Learned" list for Halloween. While we both were willing, it seems we were a little shy on items. Actually Fernando had 5 and I had none. So... I thought I'd try a different approach.

  • If you going to go trick-or-treating you need to have a costume

  • If you can drive to my house, you can't have any of my candy

  • As parents you're allowed to siphon Snickers and Reese Peanut-Butter Cups from your children's Halloween bags. You know your parents did the same to you.

  • As children you're allowed to hide Snickers and Reese Peanut-Butter Cups in your pockets. Know that your kids will pull this on you someday.

  • Three knocks on the door or two doorbell rings are sufficient. I'm coming! Relax!

  • I give out more candy for kids in cute costumes than zombie death lords... go figure.

  • Kids: Eat all the candy you can tonight, for tomorrow it might disappear.

  • You can scare all the people you want today.

  • People want to be scared on Halloween. So oblige them.

  • Even if children run away sobbing from your house with fear, just smile and say "Happy Halloween!"

  • Fathers love scaring children. I can't explain it, it just is.

  • People expect to see strange things on Halloween

  • On Halloween it it perfectly acceptable to walk around town in your PJ's

  • A smile and a well place "This is my costume" will fix any odd looks

  • Any 3 year olds dressed like the devil by their parents, will need serious therapy at some point in the future.

  • While carving up a squash would seem odd any other time of year, at Halloween we simply label it "Tradition" or "Good Fun" and it all makes sense.

  • Kids: Always accept what is offered while trick-or-treating. You can throw it away later

  • Parents: No child wants a box of raisins in their trick-or-treat basket. Let's just give healthy a rest for today, okay?

  • Dogs or cats should not be dressed up. Period. (apologizes to those who disagree)

  • Have fun and Happy Halloween!
  • 11 comments:

    Missy said...

    I have eaten more peanut butter cups from my kids bags than I have purchased in my life. Chocolate is always fair game when liberating candy. Joe found a tarantula one year right before Halloween and he gave it to our neighbor who then put it in a bowl with saranwrap over it. He presented this to the kids first before offering candy. We could hear the screams 6 houses down!

    A picture of all of you tonight would be nice.....

    Ando said...

    My dad was a notorious Halloween candy theif. My sister and I went to great lengths to conceal our stash.

    Here's another one for the list:

    If you do give out raisins, or apples, or pennies, or toothbrushes in lieu of candy, your house is fair game for reprisal.

    kludge said...

    Missy-

    My mother was a notorious Snicker fiend. My sister and I had to work pretty hard to retain those particular treats.

    I'd run in fear as an adult...

    I'll do my best to oblige. I'm sure someone will get a snapshot.

    kludge said...

    Ando-

    Why do people think this is a good idea? I agree, break out the Charmin!

    SJ said...

    Happy Halloween - I like that I can siphon candy from my daughter (she won't know anyway!!).

    I was just watching Family Feud and one of the questions was what do people give on Halloween that kids don't like - and Ando's list was basically it - I think it was toothpaste/toothbrush/dental floss, pencils, raisins, healthy food, etc. I can't imagine a cute little kid saying "Trick or treat" and I hand them a pack of dental floss. That would be so disappointing.

    kludge said...

    SJ-

    Agreed!

    "Abuse them while they can't fight back!" :)

    Roberta said...

    I have a couple of "things I've learned from Halloween", or maybe "things I've learned from dressing up for Halloween"...

    Drag queens deserve our respect; any man who can put on fake eyelashes everyday is my personal hero. It took me ten minutes to do one eye, and then another ten to scrape the glue off the rest of my eyelid.

    If you want your black lipstick to actually look black, you must apply 20 coats, so you better like the taste of wax.

    I'm sure there's more; I may have to do my own post...

    Windy City Survivors said...

    I can attest that the cute princesses and scarecrows win my favor over the older kids that go for the bloody look. Scared my poor little girls. :(

    Another thing is that if you want to hand out tracks, make sure that you include something appealing to the kids (like a full-size candy bar). That's what we did last year and this year. that will make them take a second look---I hope!

    SJ said...

    I like that idea with the tracks and candy :)

    Fernando said...

    Halloween sucked this year...
    Nice aproach on the post though, we´ll get a better chance for some mighty collaboration in the future.
    By the way, I haven´t eaten one candy in the last 24/48 hours, haven´t seen "Simpsons treehouse of horrors" episodes, no scary movie, and no costume. Did I mention Halloween sucked this year?

    jenylu said...

    "Dogs or cats should not be dressed up. Period. (apologizes to those who disagree)"

    Whoops--serious breach of etiquette at our house! :)