"So my name is Johnathan Fredericks"
"Nice to meet you Johnat-"
"No one calls me that though. I go by Suede."
Well isn't that interesting. Makes you wonder a few things. First of what's up with the whole nickname thing? How do you get a nickname? And of course, How is it a guy who goes by Kludge feels like he has the right to cap on anyones alter-egos.
So we were watching a movie last night, and as the credits roll by I see this Johnny "Suede" Lewis, one tick off. For some reason it just struck me funny. I sat there pondering it for a bit, then turned to my wife who was getting ready for bed.
"Patricia," I queried, "How does one get a nickname like Suede?"
To which she responded something about the time, why I even ask these questions, and then ended the conversation with, "How can a guy who goes by Kludge even ask that question."
Clearly I was going to have to solve this puzzle by myself. So I put my thinking cap on and went to work. The first thing I figured out is how many names we already have. I mean, don't the majority of us get three right off the bat? And who really uses their middle name?
Most people don't even know that they have a middle name, unless they have to fill out a form or something. For me there is always that pause...middle name....right. I used to get a refresher course frequently when I was a child in my parents house. They were always using my middle name, and it was never a pretty sound! Seems wrong to invent a new name for yourself when a perfectly good one is lying fallow in the middle of your name.
"Oh, so you don't like Patrick eh?"
"Well I just thought "Dry-Rot" had a better ring to it. You don't mind that I never used you in quotes do you?"
There is also the simple point of communication. If everyone has thee or four different names, it would get confusing.
"Have you seen Headrush?
"Which one is he?"
"Short fellow with red hair."
"Oh! Boy Wonder! He's over by Suede"
"Which one is Suede-"
Which begs the next question, How do you get a nickname? Do you earn it through feats of strength, cunning or wisdom? How does it work? Do you pick one for yourself? Is it purchased online or at a nickname shop in the mall?
"How much for that nickname... uh 'QuailBoy'"
"It's on discount today. Surprisingly enough"
I have been given a fair share of nicknames in my life. Some I liked and some, well not so much. Kludge though is not a nickname. Its a web handle. I use it for computing use, and nothing else. I suppose it's similar after a fashion though. Maybe I need to get a good nickname though...Something really out there like 'HardHat' or 'Thumbs'. Just to make people wonder...
How did he get a nickname like that?