Someday In May

Before the moon had gone away
Sometime in the month of May
In my bed I did still lay
I knew from there I’d have to stray
And I could hear my body say
Get up, wake up and start the day

Preferred to stay beneath the sheet
But soon I was upon my feet
And then morning I did greet
Though my belly yearned to eat
Breakfast would be long to meet
For first a task I must complete

And to the shower I did go
In that place where waters flow
To disinfect that smell I know
Bitter grounds for contempt to grow
In folks who let their feelings show
I turned the dial and set it so

I entered in the misty air
Where climate is near perfect there
The water wrapped me as I’m bear
I sang a song and wet my hair
And in that otherworldly stare
I smiled and felt the showers care

But before the task grew old
What happened there must be told
My loyalties that shower sold
It’s waters turned to freezing cold
And of my senses it took hold
Sucking from me all that’s bold

Emerging with a frigid face
Shivering in that lonely place
Reaching for my towel post haste
I wrapped me at a frantic pace
I tried from me the cold to chase
And thus I’ll state my resolved case

When from the shower I did come
My body icy, cold and numb
A simple episode to some
Changed me as a man struck dumb
To misery I did succumb
And this new life of tedium

Nearly eight years have gone astray
My worse fears I can’t outweigh
As for the shower I say nay
I will not venture in the fray
Every since that fated day
Sometime in the month of May

-Peter Brown 2006


Jason said...

There are tears in my eyes as I pen these words. Mr. Kludge. . .you MUST take a bath someday. If you do not, you will be three feet thick!

Showers are not that bad, just cold ones. Storms come to all of us in life at times. And the best thing to do is, grab a bar of Zest and head on out there and brave the elements.

(Just make sure you take a TOWEL with you)

kludge said...

LOL!! Your right the buildup is harder and harder to chisel away.

I suppose it would be wise to tell folks that I'm for showers or I'll soon find myself without a social life. I do hate cold showers, and this was my Saturday morning.

J Crew said...

Cold showers are not fun at all. This is one of the reasons why I like the fact that Christine works from home because I get to shower first

SJ said...

Cold showers are the worst - and again - I commend your creativity - it amazes me!

Aunt Missy said...

With this ode to cold showers, I am reminded of your story about the broken water pipe in the shower and I laugh out loud, especially the part where you turned the valve all the way on!!! You crack me up.

Brendan said...

People only ever complain about cold showers in the winter... mid summer when its 120 outside, most would be glad to bathe in glacier melt.

kludge said...

J Crew-

It's normally not an issue, both Patricia took hers AND bathed both the girls.
There's nothing like ice cold shower halfway through my shave...I had to stay in.

kludge said...


I concur, and thank you.

kludge said...

Aunt Missy-

That was hysterical. I'd like to say I forgot about the incident, but everytime I shower the new fixture brings it back to my mind.

jenylu said...

Have you thanked God yet for that freezing shower which was the source of such inspiration? :)

kludge said...


I understand. Too hot is bad too, maybe even worse. I have a auto sprinkler that chooses a random time to go off. There are few things as scary as all the cold water being diverted from your shower to feed the lawn.

kludge said...


I can't say that I have, but the experience certainly did turn out quite a bit of lines of light verse. More than I was first expecting

Sarah said...

Your creativity amazes me. I couldn't come up with something like that in a hundred years. Funny, witty and quite amusing. Thanks for the laugh this morning.

kludge said...


Thaanks for the ego boost! I aim to please. I really like doing the light verse.