20 Things That I Just Don't Get

Girl colors. Red, blue and green. After that, I'm totally out of my league.

Running. Unless someone is chasing me, this seems like a pointless endeavor.(with apologies to Mr. Parrish)

Holding the bacon. If you're going to get cheese and avocado on your burger then order fries and a side of fried zucchini. then the bacon is the least of your concerns.

Sporting Stats. If the game was so boring that the only thing to talk about is someones RBIs' then it's time to find a new hobby.

Sun Tan Lotion. A useful product, but scary as hell. You have zero clue what you're rubbing on your face!

Reality TV. I want to escape reality, that's why I watch TV. Now what am I suppose to do?!

Penny Loafers. Are you really suppose to put pennies in there? Honestly, it looks pretty strange.

Reading my name at the grocery store. Thanks, for the bacon and insincerity. I'm not sure which is worse for me.

Bees. Are they all just looking for a fight? "Chill man. I wasn't looking at your queen!"

Wheat-grass shots. I've never seen someone smile while drinking these. There has to be an easier way!

Style. By this I simply mean, buying something not because you like the way it looks, but only because someone else does. Do they then have to buy what you like?

Pulpy orange juice. If I had wanted to chew it, I wouldn't have poured it in my glass.

2001: A Space Odyssey. I will never understand this movie. Period.

Dvorak keyboard layout. What's the matter? Too good to use what's printed on the keys?

Macintosh Computers. Sorry Apple folks, I'm just not into overspending for a logo, and once less mouse button. And yes, it burns me up how slick the iPhone really is!

Regulating others. Save your offspring, if someone wants to do something really stupid, we should let them. Either they'll learn or not. If you can't change them, you're certainly not going to stop them.

Shoe collecting. It's like the smallest part of your attire. Why do you need thirty-eight pairs of shoes?

Chewing tobacco. Nothing says, "I don't want to make eye contact", like a giant lip buldge, and a brown drip down your chin!

Giving up caffeine. Is there a shortage? Then what's the problem?

Blogs. Who's so self absorbed that they think others care about their opinions! Wait...