Saturday, June 06, 2009

Frisbees Are Evil - Repost

Sometimes I refind a post after a couple of years, and like it enough to repost. This is just such a post. Enjoy, this Kludge Classic!

Over the 4th of July a number of us went to Spring Lake and had a picnic. It was nice, I got some sun, Dew and fried chicken. I also gained a valuable bit of information. Frisbees do not follow directions well, and they seem to have a nasty bent on making people suffer. I can only conclude that Frisbees are evil.

My Father-in-law is a very nice man, but even he is unable to correct the evil nature of these discs! While we were playing a seemingly happy game the disc attacked the group of female spectators for no apparent reason. It was particularly interested in the younglings. It identified the smallest baby and flew at it. Luckily the women deflected it. Back in the hands of my father-in-law the Frisbee again wielded its power and went back to the babies for revenge. My father-in-law was rebuked, which is what the evil saucer was really after.

My Frisbee is manic depressive. I can only attribute this to the design on the top. It’s a yellow disc with a large smiling face. It’s hard to be evil with a large smiling face on your top. We would get an hour or so of very nice behavior followed by thirty minutes of sheer terror. Flying at small dogs, children playing, or people sitting on park benches minding their own business. It also tried to make me go into the woman's restroom half a dozen times or so to retrieve it. Luckily Frisbees aren’t good at corners. It’s hard to guess what a Frisbee is thinking, but it can’t be happy thoughts.

One of the players stopped the Frisbee, that I had thrown, from knocking all the teeth out of his little girls head. This was done quite expertly, and in just the nick of time. I had no evil in my heart when I tossed the toy, but it knew exactly what it wanted. Costly dental X-rays. Evil Frisbees are so like that.

3 comments:

Jason Michael Parrish said...

Physics tells us at the quantum level, all sub-atomic particles are aware of all the other sub-atomic particles in the universe.

Naturally, when they get together, say in a frisbee, they have a mind of their own. Frisbees have a few bad electrons and since bad company corrupts good character and apples, it only makes sense that your yellow frisbee hath need of purging from evil.

kludge said...

Wow.. That logic so works for me!! Awesome!

lifeofando said...

Which is why I only play volleyball when at the park.