I normally don't use this space for journaling. I know that most of you don't come here to hear a grown man whine about his life. We've all got troubles, so I should just suck it up and come up with something witty to post. Come on geek boy, make us laugh...As noted previously, I'm in a allergy melt down. The pretty flowers are in bloom and and my nose and sinus track are in full revolt. I'm a snot spewing, Old Faithful Geyser but instead of harmless water vapor it is a vile mix of nasal fluids. No one will be buying a t-shirt in the gift shop. I feel like an Icelandic volcano with an unpronounceable name ruining the long term travel plans of innocent bystanders.
"Hello"
"AHHH-AHHH-AHHH- CHOO!"
"Well, that was completely disgusting."
"Sawry..."
"I was on my way to the store but I guess I'll go home and change now"
My solution has been nothing short of inspired. A brilliant mix of courage and bravery. I'm going to dope up on NyQuil, Benadryl and sleep right through this misery. Seems the world has other plans.
Saturday morning the wife wakes me out a Benadryl haze.
"Good Morning"
-blink-
"So... Your computer has a Blue Screen Of Death on it."
"uhg..."
Troubleshooting a computer while high on diphenhydramine is frustrating and amusing both at the same time. After about two hours of sleepy sleuthing, my observations skills finally kicked in.
"Hon... I think I got it!"
"What is it?"
"The error is 'INACCESSIBLE_BOOT_DEVICE' So..."
"On no. Your hard drive crashed!?"
"I was going to say memory, but that makes more sense..."
Right after that I go a call from work and had to go fix a down site. The main trouble with this, besides my obvious denigrated teching abilities, is the fact I had to leave the house. I had to venture from my hermetically sealed house into a world of vicious Petunias and maniacal Marigolds. Needless to say, my nose was not happy.
After about two hours of being outside and there was nothing the Benadryl could do to stop the pollen assault. By the time I returned home my sneezing was at a fever pitch. I had graduated from tissue to paper towel in a hope of keeping disintegrated tissue paper from texturing my face and clothes in a foul sticky spackle!
So that was Saturday. Three boxes of tissue, countless sheets of paper towels, two Benadryls, one busted hard drive and a very red sore nose.
Today, I'm doing my best to stay indoors all day. Of course with the sheer volume of snot and phlegm expelled from my snout, it makes you wonder. Where does it all come from? A question that every sick person has at one point pondered. A question that might never be answered...
4 comments:
I've always figured that if there was one thing that I would change about human anatomy, I would completely and utterly destroy the nose. I don't know about most people, but I can't even smell all that great from it anyway. All it does is let disease get in, and snot go out. Why can't we breathe through our tongues, like snakes?
And... NyQuil... It makes the world go round. There's nothing quite like a night of sleep when under the influence of NyQuil.
Hve you tried a Neti pot?
One other thing, have you tried local honey? Local honey contains local pollen and will theoretically build up your resistance to pollen. I have no idea if this works.
Amos-
Thanks for stopping by!
I used to get shots years ago. That was the only thing that helped. Back then I was suffering 7 months of the year. Now it's less than one.
I just tough it out and write whining blog posts to compensate! :)
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