20 Things I Learned As A Sysadmin

  • “Nothing’s wrong with the system” is always the first line of defense.

  • The longer you do this the less intelligent that users seem.

  • It always works on my computer.

  • I’d explain how I fixed it but you wouldn’t understand, so I just say “SYS-ADMIN USE STRONG MAGIC!”

  • Trust me, you’re doing it wrong.

  • </joy> <work> If you get it. It’s funny.

  • I’m not reading your email for fun; I’m checking the servers load.

  • Overhead lights wash out the monitor.

  • Walls are for your protection, indoors is where it’s safe.

  • I send Bill Gates a Christmas card every year. Poor code pays my mortgage.

  • Backups are never corrupted unless the data might actually be needed.

  • GUI’s are for the helpdesk and babies.

  • Windows? Reboot.

  • Declining social skills are part of the job.

  • Never trust a tan Systems Administrator

  • Coffee, Coffee, Coffee. This cannot be overstated.

  • The less rights users have, the better for everyone.

  • Managers should never be allowed to touch systems. This is just borrowing trouble.

  • Calling tech support means admitting you are fallible. Avoid this at all costs.

  • The answer is “No, I didn’t change anything” even if you have to lie through your teeth to say it.

    • >

    13 comments:

    1. Stephanie2:06 PM

      Ok - this is going to make me look dumb, but it took me a bit to figure out what "sysadmin" was - - - but now I get it! And - I think the last one is a great one - I tell Matt and Jeremy that - "I didn't change anything" - or "I didn't do anything - it just happened."

      ReplyDelete
    2. Peter Brown2:13 PM

      SJ-

      This don't feel dumb- this was a *very* geeky post for me. I try to avoid too many of these, but it struck me funny.

      I agree #20 is a cardinal rule in most aspects of computing.

      ReplyDelete
    3. J Crew2:59 PM

      This is all code to me. All I know is that when it breaks they fix it and it makes me happy. Enough said

      ReplyDelete
    4. Ando3:18 PM

      Is there like a book you guys all read? These sound a lot like things my IT guy would say. His standard line is, "That SHOULD'T make a difference."

      ReplyDelete
    5. Peter Brown3:23 PM

      J Crew-

      You seem like an easy going user. The scary ones are the those people who 'think' they know how everything works!

      I guess you couldn't say 'all Greek to me' as now that makes sense!

      ReplyDelete
    6. Peter Brown3:27 PM

      Ando-

      He sounds like a keeper!

      It just comes with years of practice, just like how you know all that RBI stuff and other Basketball terminology!
      <wink!&gt

      BTW Thanks for the Digg!

      ReplyDelete
    7. Anonymous5:29 PM

      I submitted a problem to tech support once and their answer was "no error found, issue closed" So basically if they couldn't solve it, they get to tell me it doesn't really exist!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
      I want that job...

      ReplyDelete
    8. Ando8:42 AM

      No, he's not a keeper. He's a pain. We give him unflattering nicknames.

      ReplyDelete
    9. Anonymous5:29 AM

      where is the any key?

      ReplyDelete
    10. Anonymous11:16 AM

      @jl, the any key is RIGHT THERE, although yours might be disguised as a space bar.

      ReplyDelete
    11. محمد عادل8:00 AM

      All are correct, Specially ( Strong magic ).

      ReplyDelete
    12. Anonymous5:42 PM

      racist..


      # Never trust a tan Systems Administrator

      ReplyDelete
    13. Anonymous5:42 PM

      "The problem is between the chair and the keyboard"

      or

      "nut loose on keyboard"

      ReplyDelete